Urgent appeal for help…

From Br. Freddie. 

Suggestions, anyone?  

 

Testament

Humanity, priesthood, poetry:

This is how I can summarize my brief life of 68 years. If I could start again, I’d choose the same things the Lord has chosen for me. Because I’m convinced that everything He did for me in my lifetime, along with every event which happened along the way belong to Him, the Lord. And I can only feel gratitude for this.

 

When I go, I will not be apart from you. Love cannot die, and during my whole lifetime, the only thing I did, the only thing I knew how to do was love you. 

Ciao Padre S!

My dear friends,

Today I received the sad news that our beloved Padre Salvatore passed away yesterday. I knew his time was coming soon, and I was so surprised and touched that he called me last Thursday to say hello…well I guess it was goodbye.

I’m very sad right now - I actually feel as though I’ve lost a very close relative, but I guess the 500 emails we exchanged over the past four and a half years attest to the fact that I consider him my spiritual father, and he considers me his spiritual daughter. God knows, I am so grateful for this! 

Thank you all for your prayers and thoughts over the past year.

If you have trouble with the video just copy and paste the url in your search engine thingy…whatever it’s called!

 

 

 

Divine Mercy Sunday (a bit late)

This is the prayer that jumped out at me yesterday, as I began re-reading St. Faustina’s Diary.

O My God

When I look into the future, I am frightened, But why plunge into the future? Only the present moment is precious to me, As the future may never enter my soul at all. It is no longer in my power to change, correct or add to the past; For neither sages nor prophets could do that. And so what the past has embraced I must entrust to God.

O present moment, you belong to me, whole and entire. I desire to use you as best I can. And although I am weak and small, You grant me the grace of Your omnipotence. And so, trusting in Your mercy, I walk through life like a little child, offering You each day this heart Burning with love for Your greater Glory.

Amen.

Dedicated to Br. Freddie

…who is off to Kazakhstan after a few days stopover in the UK. Good luck Br. F!

Keep in touch!!

My Holy Week

Last week was a true growing experience for me, as I translated a way of the cross for victims of abuse for my Italian blog. I was able to add something of my own to the reflections based on the things I’ve learned in these past few months of blogging on this difficult topic. I’m grateful for the meaningful exchange of ideas and experiences that I’ve been blessed with.

I was happy, and so deeply touched, when I discovered that these women (even the girl I’d requested prayers for) had walked along the way to Calvary with me and others. I was glad that my work had served its purpose, not only for them, but for me. Although I had that material for over a year, I’d never had the courage to really look at it.

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I hadn’t been to Mass since Christmas…and I wasn’t happy about it. I did nothing for Lent - no liturgies, no adoration, nothing. I read only one book during this time: “Come be my light” about Mother Teresa’s long, dark night of the soul. I found no consolation in it–actually I thought it was very boring. But at the end of the book I came upon one paragraph, from a letter she’d written toMalcom Muggeridge, which took my breath away. To paraphrase it, she said  - “Christ wants to become your nourishment. But even though you are surrounded by the abundance of this Food of life, you let yourself die of hunger.”

That was a wake up call for me. I truly felt as if I was dying of hunger, but I didn’t have the strength or the will to ask for help. But help arrived in the form of the Stations of the Cross. And with that, I went to the Good Friday liturgy at our parish and I resolved to go to confession at the first opportunity, which was Tuesday.

For months I’d been trying to understand what it was that was blocking me. I was so caught up in it that I became mired. I knew it was psychological and that it didn’t have much to do with my childhood trauma, but with more recent traumatic events. In the course of that confession, the problem was clarified. Thank God!

All I needed was something that will help me go on living my faith. I don’t mind not having earth moving experiences when I go to church. I don’t mind feeling alienated or lost, or most alone when I’m at Mass. But I’m not Mother Teresa! I needed to understand the cause, and with that understanding, I’m ok - even if I still feel no consolation at Mass. Now I know. Now I can break those chains and start walking again. 

The Lord is Risen from the dead! Alleluia! I was letting myself die of hunger, but I’m alive again. Alleluia!

Urgent Prayer request

Dear friends, I’d like to ask you to pray for a young girl who is in mortal danger at this very moment. She has endured long term abuse by someone in her family (she hasn’t told me who, yet). Apparently, she has taken some serious steps to get out of that house, but something is not right. She is now terrified that this person will retaliate, but the news she’s given me so far is sketchy at best.

This is the same girl I mentioned in the combox, who was also abused by a priest after she had confided in him. I think I represent her only hope right now, but she lives in Sicily!

There is not much I can do but encourage her to go to the social services or look for refuge at a halfway house run by the organization founded by don Oreste Benzi, a famous, saintly priest who recently passed away. I know someone who belongs to the don Benzi organization, in another city. I’m trying to pull some strings from here. We both need some serious string pulling from Heaven right now. Oh God, please protect her from despair, give her a sign of hope.

For Mario

In memory of my brother, who left us 12 years ago today after a lifelong battle with depression caused by only God knows what. He wrote that he chose this moment because “there are no holidays to make you feel sad, and springtime is on its way, with its explosion of colors and vitality”.

He died two weeks before Easter. I’ll never figure it out.

Caresse sur l’océan
Porte l’oiseau si léger
Revenant de terres enneigées
Air éphémère de l’hiver
Au loin ton écho s’éloigne
Châteaux en Espagne
 Vire au vent tournoie déploie tes ailes
Dans l’aube grise du levant
Trouve un chemin vers l’arc-en-ciel
Se découvrira le printemps

Caresse sur l’océan
Pose l’oiseau si léger
Sur la pierre d’une île immergée
Air éphémère de l’hiver
Enfin ton souffle s’éloigne
Loin dans les montagnes

Vire au vent tournoie déploie tes ailes
Dans l’aube grise du levant
Trouve un chemin vers l’arc-en-ciel
Se découvrira le printemps

Calme sur l’océan

If by chance that was not enough…

O Nuit! Viens apporter à la terre
Le calme enchantement de ton mystère.
L’ombre qui t’escorte est si douce,
Si doux es le concert de tes voix
chantant l’espérance,
Si grand est ton pouvoir transformant tout
en reve heureux.

O Nuit! O laisse encore à la terre
Le calme enchantement de ton mystère.
L’ombre qui t’escorte est si douce,
Est-il une beauté aussi belle que le reve?
Est-il de vérité plus douce que l’espérance?

A lullaby for some night owls I know…